Owning Where You Are and Sharing Your Biz Journey with Confidence
It can be really tough when you’re starting a business to feel confident in what you do and what you’re selling. Honestly, it can feel tough even when you’ve been doing it, for any amount of time. Sometimes we just all get inside our own heads and think of a gazillion and a half ways to self sabotage ourselves. Who can relate? I know I sure can! We start thinking, “what will others think, who am I to share this/sell this/teach this”- you name it. The Imposter Syndrome feelings take over and we’re left with an empty tank, no motivation, and scared to put ourselves and our businesses out there.
So how do we show up with confidence. How do we own where we are and what we do? How can we show people that we’re in this because we care! We’re passionate! And we’re the right choice for them.
The first way to start owning where we are?
1. Personal Development
If you’re struggling to feel ENOUGH- then you need to do some personal development. If you’re hunky dory and loving life- you still need to do personal development. There isn’t anyone in the world who won’t benefit from personal development. It’s how we grow! There are some great books that you can read and podcasts you can listen to that will help light a fire under your butt.
I know that it can be hard to show up because we often tell ourselves lies about ourselves, like how we’re not enough, how our goals are ridiculous, how everyone else is doing this “life” thing with such success and we’re barely getting by.. What’s worse about telling these lies to ourselves, *because they are lies,* is that we BELIEVE them. The more we say them to ourselves, the more we believe we aren’t enough, or that our goals ARE ridiculous, or that everyone is living their best life and we’re not. It’s a nasty cycle sister.
What I also know? Is that personal development is embarrassing. You agree with me don’t you? That’s why when you hear me say personal development you cringe a little, or scoff and think you don’t need it. You think personal development is only for whack jobs you are on the brink of losing their minds? Been there! Kind of ashamed to admit it now BUT I want to be real with you all and I’ve started to realize that the things we think, the things that we’re scared of, the things that make us feel embarrassed- are all actually pretty common thoughts and feelings among others.
I’ll tell you this: EVERYONE feels like they’re not “enough” at some point in their life. Everyone has these moments. This is something we really need to remember when we start feeling any type of “less than.” I’ve found that personal development has helped me feel so much less alone in these seasons of life, and has helped me to really own where I am! Because authenticity doesn’t just sell, it’s craved. It’s relatable. People want to know they aren’t alone in their thoughts and feelings! Honestly, it makes them feel a little bit more sane! It sure does for me! If we can learn to truly embrace where we are, even the messy bits, that’s what people resonate with.
You know in Frozen 2 where Olaf says “Advancing technology is both our savior and our doom.” He’s so right. Social media has us seeing everyone’s happy moments, everyone’s perfectly curated and best work, all perfection all the time and it does affect us! It can actually make us lose our focus and wish we more more like THEM instead of owning where we are and what makes us unique! Don’t believe me? Ever see someone actually get real on social media? Like a mom who shows up with super messy dirty hair and talks about how she pees when she laughs? It makes you laugh and giggle because you can relate! It’s real and it makes you think “wow ok! It’s not just me thank goodness!”
Challenge yourself to do 30 minutes of personal development a day. Whether that’s a book, or a podcast, or reading someone’s blog. Start working on yourself, and you’re going to feel so much better about where you are and how you can show up as authentically as possible.
Here are a couple of my favorite books and podcasts!
Personal development books:
Girl Wash Your Face – Rachel Hollis
Girl Stop Apologizing – Rachel Hollis
Read This If You Want to Be Instagram Famous – Henry Carroll
Brave, Not Perfect – Reshma Saujani
Millionaire Success Habits – Dean Graziosi
Personal Development Podcasts:
Goal Digger
SHE
The Skinny Confidential
The Broad Experience
Girlboss Radio with Sophia Amoruso
2. Leaning Into Your Superpowers!
Superpowers are a unique mix of your knowledge and experience that only YOU have. No one has the same experiences in life, and no one absorbs knowledge in the same way. Because of that, you have something that others don’t and it’s time to OWN it!
We need to make a mindset shift to focus on our strengths instead of our weaknesses or what we’re lacking. When we do that, our confidence will soar because we’re doing what we’re good at! If there is something you’re not good at, but has to be done in your business- outsource it! Ask someone else to do it! That way you can focus on your strengths and let someone else handle the stuff you aren’t a wiz at!
3. Kick Comparison to the Curb
Unfortunately, Comparison can be so stinkin easy to waste a lot of energy on, become distracted by, and get stuck in.
But I want to tell you something right now, comparing ourselves with others, is AGAIN, something that everyone has suffered from in some way, shape, or form. Whether that’s comparing their business, their fitness, their looks, their jobs- it’s common and you’re not alone.
Jordan Lee Dooley said “We spend a lot of our energy assuming and categorizing instead of empathizing and connecting and it needs to stop.” I couldn’t agree more.
Comparing ourselves to the people around us is like racing the person on the treadmill next to us- it gets us nowhere and more importantly, it just distracts us from our own goals.
Let me tell you something right now, you cannot run a successful life, business, or relationship if you’re too busy trying to make it look like someone else’s.
So what can we do to overcome the need to compare our race with others?
A.) Remember your purpose.
If you aren’t clear on your purpose it’s like shooting into the dark. You’ll be pursuing whatever your goal is aimlessly and open up allll the doors for distraction. Be clear and focus on YOUR goals, not anyone else’s.
B.) Remember this: Her success, is not your failure.
Just because you see someone out there killing it and doing what you want to be doing it, doesn’t mean that you’re any bit “less than.” You don’t know the circumstances surrounding her success, like how long she’s been at it. So put your blinders on, focus on YOUR goals and what you can do to get there, and give yourself grace by remembering that cheering someone else on, doesn’t hurt your progress.
C.) Communicate
Make the connection. If you find yourself comparing yourself to someone else- reach out to them. So often we compare ourselves to someone and get it in our minds that they put their pants on differently than we do. I don’t know about you, but anytime I’ve had preconceived notions about someone, they’re almost immediately shattered once I get to know them. Even though someone may seem super successful, put together, and intimidating, at the end of the day, she’s just another girl trying to find her way through life. So if you find yourself stuck on them, reach out and make that connection. Become friends and learn from each other. Knock down those walls that make you feel like you’re in a race that’s totally made up in your head. The best way to do that is to communicate. So send the DM, the e-mail, the text, and get to know you’re competition.
4. Crystal Clear Clarity
If you’re in business, you have heard “find your why,” probably a gazillion times. You know why you hear and read about it so much? Because it is SO IMPORTANT! Now I won’t go too deep into this topic because I have a whole episode on The Business WHY! That you can listen to HERE.
Finding and knowing our business WHY leads to crystal clear clarity. It helps us know our purpose and our mission for being in business. When we know our WHY, it is so much easier to make decisions, focus, and stay the course because fuzzy targets don’t get hit, and knowing our WHY leads us to clarity in our businesses.
Not only is gaining clarity important, but knowing our WHY helps us stay motivated! When you have a dream or a passion you will be inspired to go out and pursue it, but what happens on the hard days? What happens on the days people want a refund, someone leaves a bad review, someone chooses another business over yours? Having a WHY helps to keep you motivated and grounded. It pushes you on the tough days and reminds you of why you started your journey in the first place.
Really think about your WHY. Think about your values. Think about what is important to you. Think about your goals. What are you doing everyday that aligns with that? What habits have you created that will bring you closer to where you want to go? And what habits have you created are holding you back from achieving those goals.
5. Goal setting
Goal setting is crucial in order to get where you want to do. Without goals, we’re all just aimlessly going about life.
Where people often struggle with goals, is that they make them too big, and they don’t know where to start. The secret to success is baby steps and imperfect action my friends. It’s showing up consistently, and when we know what we’re working towards, that imperfect action and consistency is much more doable.
Sometimes, we’re so busy hustling that we can’t see outside of the bubble of chaos around us.
I love the exercise from Dean Grazisosi where he tells you to extract yourself from your current chaos, place yourself one year from now, and look back. What does that best year look like? When you know- write down what you would have to do, to get there. There are your goals.
If one year even seems too big for you, break it down into quarters and what you’d like to accomplish in the next three months. Then think of the steps you need to take to achieve those goals!
Once you know what goals and steps you want to conquer- here are a few tips to succeed:
A.) Set a deadline. Hold yourself accountable. So many people will break commitments to themselves before anything else, but you have to change your mindset if you want to become successful. Write down your goals, and then set a deadline to hold yourself accountable. Shift your mindset so that you don’t back down, or cancel on yourself.
B.) Set a reward. Reward yourself when you make progress on your goals, whether thats taking a day off, going out to teat, getting your nails done, whatever is exciting to you, reward yourself. When you know there’s a reward at the end of the goal, it can make finishing that goal that much easier
C.) Plan ahead. Prepare yourself for any obstacles that might come your way when trying to accomplish goals. If we prepare for set backs, and anticipate them, we’re more likely to recover and pivot faster than if we hadn’t prepared for the obstacles. So plan ahead and be ready to keep pushing on if an obstacle hits.
6.) Celebrate the wins along the way
I am all about celebrating! In our house, we love celebrating any and all achievements because WHY NOT! And that’s the same mentality I want you to have with your business! Maybe you hit 100 followers on your social media account- then celebrate! Maybe you book 5 clients in a month! CELEBRATE!
Bottom line: Stop waiting until the end to celebrate! Small wins along the way are building up to those BIG victory moments and deserve to be celebrated.
What is the point in chasing after something if you are not celebrating along the way? It’s about the journey not the end point. Goals change over time there’s never a true END because by the time you reach your current goal, you’ll have set new ones! If you are always hustling with no celebrating, that makes for a pretty sad journey! So take time to pause and reflect on how far you’ve come and CELEBRATE!
I have a friend who has what she calls “success journals.” In her success journal, she writes down all of her wins, no matter how small it may seem to a random person. When she’s having a low day, a day where she feels unmotivated, a day where she questions what she’s doing and why, she goes back and reads all her successes and they make her feel GOOD. They remind her of how far she’s come and all she’s accomplished! It reignites that fire under her butt and gives her to fuel to keep moving forward!
So start celebrating your wins, no matter how big or small. Buy yourself a new top, treat yourself to a mani/pedi, go on a trip, go out to dinner, whatever it is you like but reward yourself and enjoy this journey and everything you accomplish along the way!
And there you have it folks! 6 tips for owning your truth. Owning where you are and sharing your journey with confidence.
To wrap it up let’s go over three action items we can do today to move the needle forward:
- Action step #1: Determine your superpowers and strengths and start leaning into them! Focus on what you’re good at! Remember where your focus goes, your energy flows. So hone in on the strengths and ignore your weaknesses.
- Action step #2: Set goals for your business. When you feel yourself getting distracted, feeling down, and unmotivated- remember your goal and think of one thing you can do in that moment to get one step closer to your goal. Use goals as a way to keep you on track for what is important in your life and business. Everything else, that doesn’t align with those goals, is white noise!
- Action step #3: Figure out what small win you’ve recently had that you can celebrate this week! Make a plan to reward yourself for the successes you’ve seen!
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XOXO
Check out my last episode with Annie Bauer! You won’t want to miss it! CLICK HERE!
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